Slice of a Wrist
by Sasha-038
Summary: Gibbs walks in on Jenny cutting herself and demands to know why. Jibbs!


Jennifer Shepard sat lazily in her office leaning back in her chair. There were a collection of diamonds in front of her that Ducky had collected after his first undercover gig. He met her enemy and he liked him. He was charmed by him! He had no idea that to force her father to take that bribe he had set her up to be raped. He had hired a man to rape her! If it hadn't been for her amazing training she would probably still be traumatized. Ducky thought he was charming?! She cursed the educated doctor under her breath. She had never cursed about Ducky before, but she had to get her violent thoughts out.

She sat up and opened her desk drawer taking her pocket knife from it. She opened it expertly analyzing it closely before bringing the blade to her wrist.

She hesitated with the knife knowing that if she started this habit every time she felt bad she'd be plunging the knife into her wrists. She couldn't convince herself to stop though, so she pushed the knife in her skin, gasping at the sharp pain. Blood began to pour from her hand, the foul smell only pleasing her more. Cutting herself made her feel alive. The blood made it all real.

She heard the door fly open and screamed in surprise tossing the knife across the room and pulling her injured arm to her milky white blouse. She was too embarrassed to be proud that the knife landed forcefully into the wall. It was a throw she would've expected Ziva to make.

"Jethro, what are you doing here?" She asked after glancing at the clock to see how late it was. 2:13 in the morning.

"What the hell?!" He shouted slamming the door behind him as the thick red liquid stained her shirt noticeably. He also hadn't missed the knife in the wall and the look of fear in her eyes.

"You're cutting yourself again?" he asked in disbelief.

"Keep your voice down. If Cynthia hears this she'll get concerned." Jenny said in a dark whisper.

"She should be concerned!" He walked quickly over to her desk and held his hand out to her. "Let me see."

As if her hand couldn't move itself, Jenny used her other hand to move her bloody wrist into his palm.

He winced when he saw her wound as if he could feel it. She had not only cut herself, she had cut deep.

"Why?" He asked covering her wound with the sleeve of his shirt to slow the bleeding. She flinched at his touch but secretly enjoyed the pain.

"You don't need to know." She mumbled.

"No? When the media finds out the first female NCIS director is suicidal? That'll be on the six o clock news." He treated the statement lightly as if it was no big deal if they knew about her cuts.

"You wouldn't." She said but she didn't sound so sure.

"I'd do it to protect you." He answered.

"Get out of my office" She pulled her aching hand from him.

"No."

"NO?!" She shouted.

"Not until you tell me what the hell is going on."

"Fine then. You're fired." she responded smartly arching an eyebrow toward him.

He nodded. "Guess that means you aren't my boss anymore."

"Why are you doing this to me? Why do you have this overwhelming urge to see me hurting? Is it because of Paris, huh?" She pulled out her second knife, the one she carried with her at all times. "Do it yourself!" She said dropping the knife into his hand and holding her other wrist out to him.

"You tell me why you are doing this and if it's reasonable I'll do it."

"I'll do it myself" she said snatching the knife from him and flipping it open. He forcefully grabbed her taking the knife from her weakened hand.

" I HATE YOU!" She shrieked. "You and your stupid ego. You think everything you do is right! You judge everyone else because they aren't perfect. I'll never live up to your standards so just give it up! You screw everything up sometimes too! Difference between us, I hurt myself while you go around fucking women!"

Her using the f word meant she was serious. It also told him she was slightly drunk.

"Hurt me, Jenny! Tell me what you have to say. Tell me why you do this! Throw it in my face that I can't protect you! Come on Jen show me what you got!"

She stood there shocked, suddenly unable to speak.

"That's what I thought. You act all big and bad on the outside but in reality you're just a little girl, too scared to talk about how she fucked everything up!"

**_Flashback_**

_You're just a little girl. he said as he moved around her. He pulled his pants down and pulled her face near him 'You bite and you're dead' he said laughing a little as she tried to turn her head._

"NO!" She shouted falling to the floor, tears streaking her face with black marks from her mascara. She felt his arms wrap around her. "Please don't do this!"

"Jen" she heard the familiar whisper. She slowly became aware of her surroundings and realized it was Jethro's hands around her not... him.

"Jenny? Jen?"

She looked up at him, their eyes locking before she completely broke down in front of him, crying tears she didn't know she had.

"Why did you cut yourself, Jen?" He whispered in her ear.

"He set me up and it cost my daddy his life. He made me do it! I didn't want to! He taught me the pressure point on the hand! He made me!" She yelled.

"Calm down, Jenny" he sad sitting her down in her seat and squatting down in front of her holding her hand firmly in his. "Start from the beginning."

"La Grenoullie wanted my father to take that stupid bribe, but he was a loyal man to his duties and declined. Grenoullie knew the one thing that could convince him to take that bribe... me."

He squeezed her hand a little bit to reassure her that she was safe now.

"He set up this man to rape me. He put his... in my face. Called me a little girl. Told me if I bit him he would kill me. I was... so scared. I got away before he put himself in my mouth but I came this close." She said demonstrating a small amount with her index finger and thumb.

"You said he made me do it. What did you mean?"

She shut her eyes tightly and exhaled deeply. "My father knew about it after it happened. He knew the only way to save me was to take that bribe or kill himself. He knew if he took the bribe then it would ruin his life."

"His suicide wasn't your fault" Gibbs said.

Jenny shook her head. "I'm not finished." She took another deep breath. "He couldn't do it. He was a strong Christian believer, thought if you commit suicide you go straight to hell. He made me do it. He made me squeeze his hand so he wouldn't feel it! I didn't want to kill him but he said if I didn't he would go to hell. He said murder can be forgiven but suicide can't! I'm a murderer Jethro! And- I gave up everything to forgive myself! You lost a wife and a daughter. Imagine having to kill them! I had to let you go because I needed my revenge. I ruined everything! I killed the one person who cared about me!"

"Listen to me." He said softly once he was sure she was finished talking. "If your father made you kill him, that's not murder. You didn't ruin 'us', Jen. I love you and that'll never change. I finally found someone i love enough to get over Shannon and Kelly and it's you. Jenny, I can help you get over your father but you have to let me in."

She began crying, standing up so he could wrap her in his arms and rock her slightly side to side.

"You're okay. You're safe. I got you."

"You mean it?" she asked.

"Yeah. Let's catch this bastard." He put his hand in hers. "Tonight."

_**A/N: Debating whether to add another chapter. What do you think. Interesting enough or should I let you all finish the story in your imaginations? LMK!**_

_**-Sasha**_


End file.
